Have you ever had a morning where you could really just press the reset button? Or better yet fast forward? This morning I woke up late to an alarm clock that was blinking furiously but making no sound. I became conscious enough to remember that I had a 7:30 dental appointment, so neither sitting down with the Lord, nor finishing my cup of coffee (like I ever do) were an option. Neither were gathering my thoughts together nor nursing my headache and bum knee. Well I threw myself together, raced out the door and got to the dentists at exactly 7:25. Whew! No missed appointment fees for this momma! Lucky for me I wasn’t called for another half hour! Not. I usually schedule appointments for the first available of the day so I can get to work at a reasonable hour, so when yet another half hour passed and I was still sitting in the dentist’s chair with no dentist in site…I just left!
The receptionist was really quite apologetic, and I did my best not to be grumpy about it as I rescheduled. I could tell however, that the tech that ran up to see where I went and was listening in… was in disbelief. How dare I just walk right out of the examination room leaving their ridiculous paper clothing guard in my bottoms place. Side note- really, is a 12 by 12 piece of paper supposed to compensate for all the water they spray all over me? The last time I went, some of the water landed both on my forehead and my toes! You must be joking. But I digress.
So here I went-Run out of the office I realizing that today is one of the 9 days per year total that it rains here in SA- raining by the buckets I might add. Sooo, soaked clothes, wet hair…and I stepped in a huge puddle. Faaaantastic! Gotta go back home.
Race home. Check. Change clothes. Check Check. Put on hat- because I am brilliant and got a “cute” short cut which requires daily wrestling and beat downs to keep from resolving itself to a fro, AAAnd the rain will, in fact cause said fro by noon. Check x 3. Make smoothie because at this point I am pissed off and starving (those who know me realized that at this point I am nearing implosion.) I hop in the car, placing smoothie securely in the center console’s cup holder. Quickly raising hand with keys up before I realize that my keys had taken a sweet morning bath in smoothie, resulting in it being flung all over the steering wheel and drizzled down my clothes. Check mate.
Did I mention that I woke up already feeling stressed, depressed and annoyed? Funny, how Satan can not read our minds, but is tricky, watching us enough to know what buttons to push. He knows which thoughts to poke into your head to sway your emotions- if you let them. Funny how all of this was pretty freakin aggravating as it was happening, is now really, really funny.
If your day started with a struggle, or annoyances hit you throughout the day I would encourage you to do a few things:
First- slow down! If you are like me, you get all ramped up at a thousand mph and cause even more problems than you started with. (Stupid smoothie.)
Second- Sometimes I am too far gone to slow down and pray about it. I wish I could say that I stopped whatever I was doing and spend some time with my mighty councilor, but that my friends, would be a lie. If you can, then by all means DO THAT! But if not, then tell a friend, or 2 or 137 on Facebook. (smile) If you have surrounded yourself with loving people they will lift you up, make you laugh, and pray for you if they are the praying type. This has been an amazing discovery to this girl- who is a recovering secret sufferer! When you do settle down…do take it to the Lord, He is ever waiting to love on you.
Third- When you do have time, write it down. Journal it out. Realize what things were not that big a deal and which (if any) need to be addressed. If you acted like an ass to someone, go make amends. If you acted like an ass to yourself, let it go.
Finally- Move forward. Make the choice to enjoy the next moments instead of fuming on the last. Guard your hearts and minds from the enemy, and those that would tear you down. Don’t let silly things steal your joy.
Friday, July 2, 2010
Thursday, July 1, 2010
dichotomy
From The Merriam Webster online dictionary:
http://www.merriam-webster.com/netdict/dichotomy
Main Entry: di·chot·o·my
Pronunciation: \dī-ˈkä-tə-mē also də-\
Function: noun
Etymology: Greek dichotomia, from dichotomos
Date: 1610
1 : a division into two especially mutually exclusive or contradictory groups or entities
Picture: Me.
Galatians 5:17 "For the flesh sets its desire against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in opposition to one another, so that you may not do the things that you please."
Now let me just start out by saying that I am definitely not trying to justify or glorify any of my bad habits. They are what they are, and if God intended for me to be completely devoid of faults I think He would have just sent me straight to heaven when I got saved instead of letting me work through it all here on Earth.
Now that that is cleared up! Sometimes I see myself as a ridiculous dichotomy. The word itself has popped into my head a lot lately, but the other day was a great example. I was talking to another spunky girl I know about food. We shared a bunch of our philosophies on eating real food, the changes we are making for our families, and how we feel these changes will heal our bodies. (That topic is many, many blogs in the making). Well it just so turned out that I didn’t plan well that day, and had to run an errand with Antonio. What does this mean?…well at 10:30 I was talking about my love of raw milk, and all things naturally made and grown, and at 11:30 I was eating a burrito from taco bell. Huh? It tasted nasty, and made me (and Antonio by the way) feel terrible. Why, oh why do I do it? In that case it was a lack of planning and time. In other cases it is just something else entirely…hello- can you say spam fried rice!!!
Another thing, I love helping people. I long so deeply to help hurting and truly helpless people in so many ways. I want to do things out of love, and because it’s the right thing to do. Yet I am impatient and sometimes angry when people don’t get it. (Whatever the “it” that I’m pedaling that day is) I struggle and pray about it. Are they incapable? Unwilling? Why, why, why? I hope for the day when I really never tire of doing good (2 Thessalonians 3:13), and I pray for the day where I will have immeasurable patience and have no need for human appreciation. Today is not that day. When people are completely unappreciative, it hurts me and really ticks me off. Now when I say unappreciative, I don’t mean that I want big “thank-yous” folks but good gravy a half ounce of gratitude builds me and anyone else up and can keep us going!
My tongue has gotten me into more trouble than I care to admit. (snort) I laughed and cried pitifully when I read Anne Lamott’s book Traveling Mercies. She has a certain way of putting things that I identify with on a deep level. My favorite line:” I'm not going to tell you what I really thought of that woman in her Lycra bicycle shorts, because if I did, it'd make Jesus drink gin straight out of the cat's dish.” I wish I could say that as soon as I knew God He took away every ounce of anger and rotten thing in me, but I can’t. He did put every good thing in me, and has given me more than I can express… but the other stuff He left. I suppose because that is part of my journey, is fowl language part of His plan? Um, I don’t think so. But He’ll take me and use it anyway. I still don’t understand why I tolerate and sometimes participate in conversations that make me cringe? How can I hurt when I hear angry cursing parents and then turn around and curse in front of mine? It makes me sad and embarrassed to admit that…but well there it is. I have gotten better…with loads of prayer and working the Recovery steps (another future post). Baby steps are still steps, no matter how small and slow they are.
I could give about a bazillion more examples but I think you get the point.
Paul said in Romans 7:19 “For the good that I want, I do not do, but I practice the very evil that I do not want.” People can goody two shoes Christianity all they want, and pretend like there are no struggles and that they have it all together, but I’m here to tell you. Real Christianity is MEEEESSSY! And it’s hard. And sometimes life feels (and smells) like your stepping in dog shit instead of a garden. And all of the junk you have dealt with and will deal with doesn’t magically disappear. Paul was angry, and messy, and struggled. Yet he loved the Lord, and the Lord loved him. I think that is why I look to his writings more than many others; because they raw, and real.
Well it seems that I’m just ranting now, all to simply say that I don’t always follow a pattern, even one that I like. Sometimes I do well and sometimes I struggle. Don’t we all though? Or am I the only loony out here?
For lunch I had organic,locally grown watermelon and homemade lentil soup...YUM! Tonight? Maybe nachos with lots of cheese…and homegrown tomatoes?
http://www.merriam-webster.com/netdict/dichotomy
Main Entry: di·chot·o·my
Pronunciation: \dī-ˈkä-tə-mē also də-\
Function: noun
Etymology: Greek dichotomia, from dichotomos
Date: 1610
1 : a division into two especially mutually exclusive or contradictory groups or entities
Picture: Me.
Galatians 5:17 "For the flesh sets its desire against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in opposition to one another, so that you may not do the things that you please."
Now let me just start out by saying that I am definitely not trying to justify or glorify any of my bad habits. They are what they are, and if God intended for me to be completely devoid of faults I think He would have just sent me straight to heaven when I got saved instead of letting me work through it all here on Earth.
Now that that is cleared up! Sometimes I see myself as a ridiculous dichotomy. The word itself has popped into my head a lot lately, but the other day was a great example. I was talking to another spunky girl I know about food. We shared a bunch of our philosophies on eating real food, the changes we are making for our families, and how we feel these changes will heal our bodies. (That topic is many, many blogs in the making). Well it just so turned out that I didn’t plan well that day, and had to run an errand with Antonio. What does this mean?…well at 10:30 I was talking about my love of raw milk, and all things naturally made and grown, and at 11:30 I was eating a burrito from taco bell. Huh? It tasted nasty, and made me (and Antonio by the way) feel terrible. Why, oh why do I do it? In that case it was a lack of planning and time. In other cases it is just something else entirely…hello- can you say spam fried rice!!!
Another thing, I love helping people. I long so deeply to help hurting and truly helpless people in so many ways. I want to do things out of love, and because it’s the right thing to do. Yet I am impatient and sometimes angry when people don’t get it. (Whatever the “it” that I’m pedaling that day is) I struggle and pray about it. Are they incapable? Unwilling? Why, why, why? I hope for the day when I really never tire of doing good (2 Thessalonians 3:13), and I pray for the day where I will have immeasurable patience and have no need for human appreciation. Today is not that day. When people are completely unappreciative, it hurts me and really ticks me off. Now when I say unappreciative, I don’t mean that I want big “thank-yous” folks but good gravy a half ounce of gratitude builds me and anyone else up and can keep us going!
My tongue has gotten me into more trouble than I care to admit. (snort) I laughed and cried pitifully when I read Anne Lamott’s book Traveling Mercies. She has a certain way of putting things that I identify with on a deep level. My favorite line:” I'm not going to tell you what I really thought of that woman in her Lycra bicycle shorts, because if I did, it'd make Jesus drink gin straight out of the cat's dish.” I wish I could say that as soon as I knew God He took away every ounce of anger and rotten thing in me, but I can’t. He did put every good thing in me, and has given me more than I can express… but the other stuff He left. I suppose because that is part of my journey, is fowl language part of His plan? Um, I don’t think so. But He’ll take me and use it anyway. I still don’t understand why I tolerate and sometimes participate in conversations that make me cringe? How can I hurt when I hear angry cursing parents and then turn around and curse in front of mine? It makes me sad and embarrassed to admit that…but well there it is. I have gotten better…with loads of prayer and working the Recovery steps (another future post). Baby steps are still steps, no matter how small and slow they are.
I could give about a bazillion more examples but I think you get the point.
Paul said in Romans 7:19 “For the good that I want, I do not do, but I practice the very evil that I do not want.” People can goody two shoes Christianity all they want, and pretend like there are no struggles and that they have it all together, but I’m here to tell you. Real Christianity is MEEEESSSY! And it’s hard. And sometimes life feels (and smells) like your stepping in dog shit instead of a garden. And all of the junk you have dealt with and will deal with doesn’t magically disappear. Paul was angry, and messy, and struggled. Yet he loved the Lord, and the Lord loved him. I think that is why I look to his writings more than many others; because they raw, and real.
Well it seems that I’m just ranting now, all to simply say that I don’t always follow a pattern, even one that I like. Sometimes I do well and sometimes I struggle. Don’t we all though? Or am I the only loony out here?
For lunch I had organic,locally grown watermelon and homemade lentil soup...YUM! Tonight? Maybe nachos with lots of cheese…and homegrown tomatoes?
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